BAD REVERSE (...if you can call it that)

You are parked in the space
you are always parked in

and you are not, per usual,
paying attention.

The vehicle—let's just
call it that—is idling, and

your mind is racing, chasing
one thing or another. 

Without thinking you forget
to put your foot on the

clutch—let's just call it that.
Next, you do the one thing 

one should never do under
these circumstances: you

thoughtlessly, hard and fast,
make that quick right-

and-downward movement
with the grip of your hand.

You throw—and I do mean
throw—the stick-shift—let's

just call it that—into reverse.
Almost instantaneously

and simultaneously
two things happen.

The first: your whole body,
from fist to feet, from head,

to heart, to gut—nerves and cells
all—lurch awake. Your bones

and flesh quake to the core.
The second: the sound.

You know the one I mean.
The one that's reminiscent of

the wood chipper in the movie,
Fargo, that one. But this one,

this sound, is distinctly
more metallic. Metal

on metal, I mean.
That kind of gnashing

and gnawing. Anyway...
the simultaneity of these two

things, the sound and the feeling
of grinding, has you, again, without

thinking, shut the engine off,
and in the doing of it

you realize the motor was on
when it  shouldn't have been.

It is in this moment your body
slumps. Then, dazed and nearly

traumatized by the sudden
assault, and in the strange

stillness, you say out loud: What
have I done? There are ways

to go about backing out of
things. And ways not too.

Knowing which is which
is worth remembering,

no matter your age or whether
you are newly licensed or not.

No matter what vehicle you are
driving. Making the wrong

choice may mean you need
more than a new transmission—if

we can call it that—to get the
vehicle up and running again.